Frustrated Over Nothing – The Climb #895

Thursday 5th August 2021

I spent most of my day dealing with ongoing sexist drama.

It’s taken me a lot of time today, but I think it’s worthwhile deconstructing these tall lies people build themselves, if only to deflate some egos. Sometimes I wonder if people are ignorant, or whether it’s a choice. I’m leaning more towards the choice.

As a result, I felt a little frustrated today. I don’t feel I really achieved anything when I did manage to get a couple of writing sessions in. Mostly this is because I have two huge jobs to do, and I need a bit of space to do them. Something always seems to come along, either fill my head for the day or eat my time and I have to delay to the next.

As a result I’m really fidgety. It’s bothering me these things aren’t done.

One is a commercial job. There’s no real timescales for it, but I need brain power for it all. There are more moving parts than I’m used to and as such, it’s all new and scary. And as we go through revisions it only gets harder. I feel like my head might pop whilst simultaneously knowing I’m making this way to hard on myself. I just need to get some quiet time and get it done.

The second is a test I need to do on my PC. It needs a paperclip. I don’t have a paperclip, and trying to find one is time consuming. We’ve gone digitial… people don’t have paperclips any more. I worry that they’ll close my ticket whilst I look.

On more positive news, I might be about to get my Twitter back. I’m holding off until I do to celebrate as this has been a total nightmare. Once I do, I’ll have no reason not to be more consistent with my social media posts.

I also want to progress with my sports psychology course. I’ve been really enjoying it and I’ve done really well in the tests. Again, it just seems like time is against me.

The Accursed is proceeding. I got two sessions in, but I kinda want this first draft done. I’m approaching 115k words and it’s looking like a 160k beast. I wanted to be onto the next novel by now but that seems a long way off.

I know when I look back at this time a year from now, I’ll say how busy I was. The trouble is I currently want to do a week’s work in a day and then get frustrated with myself when I’m unable to do this.

I’ll be a lot happier when I get these big things get done, but that means carving out some time for them tomorrow, which means I need to not focus on other things.

Basically, I need a 48 hour long day at the moment. I’m in the guts of projects, and whilst making progress, it doesn’t feel like it today.