Thursday 4^th June 2020

I couldn’t get out today for a walk because the weather has turned. Whilst I’m not a fan of the blistering heat, I dislike having to find out a hoodie and discovering how tight they feel.

Today was a bit of a slob day. I never went for my walk, I ate badly last night (although it had been planned as a treat) and ended up sat on the sofa watching TV all night.

Part of this is the limbospace I’m finding myself in at the moment where I’m waiting on a number of things. It stops me starting new projects, and delays projects I’ve already got in progress

It’s meant my discipline has been a bit all over the place the last couple of weeks… and it wasn’t great to start with.

When Legeddon happened and everything in my world seemed to spin out into total chaos, the way I brought things back under control was to start with something simple. For me that was to walk around the block. With a 6” hole in my leg, that wasn’t easy and it took me a long time.

But that was the thing. I started bringing things back under control just with a daily walk. Now I can romanticise it if I want and say how I did that every day… but like now, some days were better than others. The point is, that even with the occasional day off, I really focused on that daily walk.

Weirdly, it was on those daily walks that the first ideas for Black As Knight were formed. It kept my mind off the pain and gave me some added incentive to do that walk round the block.

As I got healthier, so the walks increased. I went on my legendary 25 mile solo geocaching adventure whilst still bandaged up. I then increased my walks to jogs, focused on getting fitter and bringing down weight so that I could start the new year by ticking off 2 of the things on my bucket list: learning to swordfight and going tornado chasing.

But everything started from that simple daily task of walking round the block.

And so it is now with the world in fucking chaos right now that I’ve tried to emulate those times. Start with that daily walk. It’s the foundation I’m using to build every other habit atop.

So it frustrates me more than you know when it doesn’t happen. Yes, things are much better than back then, and the reason for so much inaction is because I’m waiting, but I feel even then I need some routine.

Tomorrow I’ll wear a coat and sweat or simply get wet.