Sunday 5th September 2021 

I was in such a bad mood today. 

For what feels like months, I’ve wanted to get traction on a few new projects.  I’ve discovered that whilst I’m not really a procrastinator, I do like the comfort of planning to ensure everything is in place and ready.  Work gets done, work gets promoted, work gets cross-promoted.  And time after time, one element or other of these grand plans have had a spanner in the works and everything grinds to a halt:  Twitter is suspended and I need to unsuspend it, computer is broken and I can’t edit videos, etc.

Now, there’s an argument that I need to be a bit more flexible to be able to cope with these spanners, and I agree.  My issue is part lack of contingency planning, it’s part wanting perfectionism in my plans. 

But, the point is:  I finally get everything in place. I combat my internal fears that tell me videos are too long, that the editing is crap, that they’d be better if I slowed the pace down to weekly right now.  I make content and I put it on blast, happy in the knowledge that it could very well fail and that would be OK. 

Systems: check.  Mental focus: check. 

And then a Pokemon Go event comes along. 

It’s not so much that the event was on and I needed to make time for it.  I’ve been juggling loads of things all last week.  It’s that it came unexpectedly.  In being busy on video editing, working on multiple projects, and generally being focused on a million and one things right now, I’d not know there was a Pokemon Go event on until yesterday. 

And it turns out it’s one with a collection challenge, and limited time research which rewards an exclusive avatar pose.  So under my own rules of what I do in Pokemon Go these days, it’s an event I can’t skip. 

And so, everything I had planned for Sunday to try and set myself up for success next week suddenly goes out the window and I’m annoyed. 

The thing is, I’m not sure who I am annoyed with.  I have the option of not doing the event and focusing on getting work done for next week instead.  And, likewise with the content next week, no-one is forcing me to do a daily cadence… that’s all on me. 

I guess there’s a part of me that feels I’ve had spanners in the works for so long, that now I currently don’t, I should be running. 

Get the content out now.  Get momentum going while you can.  because sooner or later, something will come along to try and derail you. 

I’ve not been stupid (or that stupid).  I’ve said I’ll only do a daily cadence for 2 weeks, and even then I will only do weekdays.  In theory that should allow me a couple of weekends to catch up or rest. 

But because I worked late last night and then got up early this morning, trying to do some of the prep work that I had originally planned to do today, I’ve been tired, and my mood has been best described as “someone who has just woken up”.  I’m grumpy, but grumpy without apparent reason. 

I can do all the work I need to next week, today would have just been a help.  I’d already done a load yesterday and got further work done this morning.  I have no reason to be so grumpy. 

The event was a pretty good one as Pokemon Go events go, although I don’t see why it needed me to leave the office to play it on the Support Bubble sofa (where there are radios blaring and all sorts of distractions that means I can’t write, even if I take my laptop with me).  I got it done in a couple of hours and then sat around in a bad mood that I’d wasted the rest of the day. 

I’ll recover tomorrow, when another hectic week begins.  I’m focused on getting these projects from being planned, through implemented to something with momentum.  Anyone around me understands I’m a bit like this with projects at times, whether they be written projects or video ones.  I direct my frustration inwards because I know I’m being grumpy for no real reason. 

At least it goes as quickly as it comes. 

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Past Years: 2020 – The Year of Being Fearsome | 2019 – The Year of Soldiering Through | 2018 – The Year of Priorities | 2017 – The Year Of The Offensive