Tuesday 18^th August 2020

Today has been a glum day.

I’ve worked out that writing is very integral to me getting through this pandemic. It’s my escape. It’s why I busy myself with little projects. All the time I’m working on something I’m focused on that and not the general shitshow that is 2020, where the pandemic is just one of a long list of crappy things.

So it’s no surprise that on days when I really don’t have any writing project to do, I might look up from my screen, see the world on fire, and feel a little down about it all.

I feel I need to start a new major project to really take my mind off things, but that might be a few weeks away and so instead, I am just trying to keep myself busy with little projects.

The downside to all this, is that when I’m having a day I feel a bit flat, I find anything I might suggest to myself doesn’t spark my interest like it might otherwise. So I find myself wishing the day away.

This is similar to how I feel when I get a rejection. It is what it is and there’s no use getting upset about it, but at the same time, I know I’m not going to get anything productive done for the rest of the day.

Likewise, I’ve just not been in a mood to be positive today, so it’s not worth looking into different projects in case my general glumness causes me to dismiss them unfairly.

Instead, I tell myself that tomorrow will be different. Hopefully, I won’t feel so shitty, and I can once again be excited about those little projects that have been keeping me busy.