Crossing Into Enemy Territory – The Climb #167

Friday 7^th July 2017

I continued to keep away from people today. Following Wednesday night’s panic attack, I’ve seen my low turn into anger. Mainly because it could have been avoided. I’ve got a pretty thick skin and people can be pretty blunt around me, but having a go at me when I’m in an already stressful situation isn’t just unfortunate, it shows a lack of respect.
I think that’s what has annoyed me most. I often say that I’ll take everything with a grain of salt up until a level. So someone says something off to me, I’ll attribute it to them having a bad day or me interpreting it in a way it’s not intended. I don’t need the drama and so I’ll usually let it go.
But every so often some people wander so deep into no-man’s land that they are in enemy territory… and that’s when I get pissed off. Just because I rarely take offense doesn’t mean it gives you the right to cause offense. I’ve sometimes had people complain that when they’ve crossed a line, I switch. If someone really pisses me off, then they’ll know about it, and I’ve had some say that this binary attitude is a bit confusing for them. But, if you are at the point where you are past no-man’s land and into no-man’s land, I think you should have long asked yourself whether what you’re doing or saying is acceptable or not. Just because I haven’t reacted negatively up until that point doesn’t make it my fault when I do.
Anyways, as you can tell… I’m very pissed off about this. I’ve felt shit for a couple of days for something that’s not my fault.
So instead I’ve played a fair bit of World of Warcraft this evening. It just takes me away from myself for a couple of hours, and so despite having nothing I really wanted to do, I kept myself entertained playing this and watching Australian Masterchef (I am so far behind!)
I want to run some dungeons but tanking can be stressful and I really can do without the stress at the moment. Instead I soloed some Draenor dungeons and raids.
I did take breaks though. And I used those breaks to read through Black as Knight.
I’m currently reading through the changes I’ve made. I do this by reading it aloud. It can be easier to spot issues this way as they seem to trip up the tongue. I try and put some effort behind my reading as well. Not only is this good practise if I ever do readings but I think the more dramatic the presentation the more the issues will present themselves.
It’s tiring work though (which is another reason for constantly dipping into Warcraft). I read the last draft I sent to my agent aloud over a week and by the end of it my voice was so hoarse.
I’d like to make some good progress over the weekend but I’m aware that I really need to mow my back garden and I suspect, given how a reasonably sized animal (such as a cow) could get lost in my grass at the moment… it may be a bit of a task.
If you want to follow more of my journey, then be sure to check me on my social channels. Likewise, if you’d like me to expand on any point mentioned above, please say so in the comments.