Wednesday 26th May 2021

Wednesday is typically my Warcraft day, which means I tend not to be too productive on other things.  But after getting the Maw mount yesterday from completing Twisting Corridors, I was able to collect souls quicker and get all my alts done faster than last week.  It meant I had time for a good writing session in and as a result feel generally pleased.

What wasn’t so good was that I heard back about the script.  Given there were over 5000 entries, and it was probably only the second script I ever wrote, I wasn’t surprised that it didn’t make the cut.  That’s the weird thing about writing.  You can expect the rejection but it’s always a disappointment when it comes.

So I’ve been more focused on the fact I had my biggest single session word count since before the pandemic.

I might try sending it somewhere else, but that’s for some time in the future.  I kinda like the idea of always having something on submission from the various writing streams I have, and despite the news only being just a few hours old, I don’t like the idea of not having a script out there.

My confidence has taken quite a bit of a knocking in 2021.  Again, nothing that wasn’t anticipated as a possibility but it’s always a downer when your best hopes don’t come true.

I’ve deliberately kept myself busy.  If I don’t then I’m going to start questioning myself.  If I ask myself whether I think I’m any good or just deluded, a lot is going to depend on the day.

I’ve gone back to watching a lot about people’s success and how there’s this almost arrogance in believing that they would succeed.  I think I could do with a little more of that.  At the same time,   I want to talk to people about writing without subconsciously trying to big myself up.

I like to think I’m pretty level-headed about everything.  If I wasn’t I would not have been able to continue writing this year.  But I do find there are times when I find myself mentioning my agent.  I know it’s a self-confidence thing and it’s subtle enough not to be noticed by some people, but I’m working hard not to feel the need to slip that in there as some sort of qualifier for having authority to speak about writing.

But most of all, I just want to continue to chip away at this manuscript.  At times it feels a mess, but I’ve honestly had so much practise at rewriting it doesn’t scare me at all.  If I can just continue to ramp up the word count of my writing sessions, I could get this first draft done and dusted.

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Past Years: 2020 – The Year of Being Fearsome | 2019 – The Year of Soldiering Through | 2018 – The Year of Priorities | 2017 – The Year Of The Offensive